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The Wisdom of Ding! boy

Jun 11 2007

In the past year or so, I have thoroughly enjoyed reading all of everyone's comments, and the dialogue has been great.  Sometimes, specific comments stand out, but at other times, the comments form a stream of consciousness.  No, I am not talking about William Faulkner or James Joyce, but here is a specific example of which I am talking.  If you have been reading the blog for any amount of time, you have probably noticed those catchy slogans with which Ding! boy (aka Joe Friedmann) almost always closes his blogs.  If you haven't noticed, here's a sampling-along with my "scholarly" narrative in parenthesis.  (The first one below is a complete version-I have deleted the "Ding! boy" from most of the rest):

No messages to display. Stay tuned for new messages.

Ding! boy

Joe  (But, there are plenty more messages, see below.)

As told to.  (Gee, sounds like a celebrity autobiography to me.)

The total due exceeds the available balance. Please insert more money.  (Was this a sign next to a slot machine?)

Now caffeine free (Since when did water have caffeine anyway?)

Now with real fruit juices (As opposed to unreal juice?)

Remove foil before microwaving (Well, duh!)

Searching to find out who plants dandelions in my yard... (Rumor has it that this is being done by the grouch down the street from Joe.)

I injured my endoplasmic reticulum today!   (Ouch, Ding! boy that must hurt.)

A tradition in airplane dining experience for over 35 years!  (Aren't "airplane" and "dining experience" self-canceling phrases?)

Blog boy says, "Smithers, get me some more candy corn."  (Egggggselent)

The following program is intended for immature audiences only. Viewer indiscretion is ill advised.   (I never want to be ill advised, but I have been called immature before.)

I go! You go! We all San Diego!  (So, where in the world is Carmen San Diego?)

No postage necessary if mailed in the United States (How about if you mail it in Guam?)

We plan-you plant.  (See dandelion reference above)

Remove infant before folding stroller.  (So, that's how they work?)

½ block north of the current location (Are you on the east or west side of the road?)

Outstanding in the field.  (Is this better than being out sitting in the field during a lightning storm?)

And here are my two favorites, which are both references to the funniest movie ever made, Airplane

Shirley, you can't be serious!  (I told you not to call me Shirley!)

The white zone is for the immediate loading and unloading of passengers. There is no stopping in the red zone.  (I'm sorry, Joe, but I didn't hear that because I have a drinking problem.)

And finally, Doing the "I'm famous dance"

Ding! boy

Joe  (After this post, you are famous Joe!)

We salute your Fun-LUVing attitude, Ding! boy, and you make our lives a lot brighter with your "off-the-wall" signoffs.  Reading your comments is almost as much fun as reading the old Burma Shave roadside signs from when I was a little bloglett (borrowed from Ding! boy and his dingletts) riding in the car with Blog Dad and Blog Mom.  You've helped make Nuts About Southwest what it is today.

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Comments

Hello to me.
926pm est

"Please have 14 pieces of id available for tsa inspection.
They donÃ

Intense concentration Kim-san.

Please have 14 pieces of id available for tsa inspection.
They don't have to be yours.

Joe,
How in the world do you come up with such brilliance?

I sit in awe of your wit...

Kim
EBB :)

One more comment from me before I fall onto the next page.

Minimum 45% post consumer content.
Ding! boy
Joe

Thank you every one.
Here is one I made for my cousin who is going to another country as an exchange student

Bud light presents real women of genius. (Real women of Genius.) Today we salute you Miss oversized carryon luggage stuffer. ( Miss oversized carryon baggage stuffer)
You manage to fit a 35 inch bag into a 25 inch compartment while holding up an entire flight. ( Come on I want to get to my seat) You don't care how many people wait, you just do it. (Miss oversized carryon baggage stuffer.)
Bud light St Louis Missouri

Here is her response-
Bravo! Bravo! *round of applause*
I must say, that was quite entertaining

Ding! boy
Joe

Your current ad re non-stop is offensive. Also it is a put down on the Oriental people. Makes them look rude and crass.

Lots of cool sayings. But I don't know where to put this, but my thoughts
and prayers to Kenneth Cummings and his family both immediate and of course this one. I'm assuming his base is HOU.

Paco,
What in the world are you doing letting business interfere with your blog reading?? Put 'em on hold and let 'em listen to the witty comments there, or tell 'em to just call aanother aairline and see if they like the fares over there!

Joe,
Our leader and the son of Blog Dad and Blog Mom is absolutely correct! Your witty, clever, irreverent, irrelevant and hilarious "sign-offs" absolutely add a pricelss touch to our little corner of the cybersphere. We wouldn't be what we are (what are we?) without you!

Thanks for your wonderful contributions!

Kim
External Blog Boy :)

Of COURSE the one that had me almost falling out of my chair laughing (while on a call with a customer, mind you) was:

"PHX sky harbor
Due to noise abatement procedures caused by Paco and Kim arguing over movie screens and steaks,traffic is experiencing Gate Hold and Taxi delays between 30 minutes and 44 minutes in length and decreasing."